The following was copied as is from a Facebook status update. The words were posted in a black box, thus, not copied exactly, as I am posting it as a sentence.
DONT JUDGE ME....You can't handle half what Ive dealt with...theres a reason I do what I do....theres a reason I'm who I am
Even as the poster yells: don't judge me, poster judges all Facebook friends, because it is posted in news feed for all friends to read. None, no, not one, of us can handle half of what person has. Oh, really?
I am going to do a bit of judging or pondering what caused the person to bring a man to live in her mother's house, and a kitten. If her mother were coherent, she would not allow person to do either of those things. I have dealt with lots of stuff in my life, but would not think to disrespect my mother, simply because she is no longer capable of raising her voice in objection.
The man is verbally abusive. He acts like he owns my mothers house and caused such disharmony among her children, the brother responsible for her, was going to sell the home and bring mother to live with him and his wife. Person, quickly had her boyfriend move out. Then he became ill and she let him move back in with her. Does he pay rent? Doubtful.
At any rate, I found that status update to be offensive. Perhaps I have dealt with things the person could never handle. And we all have our reasons for doing what we do, be it good deeds or drunken stupors.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Children learn what they live
What to comment on a Facebook status update like this one: Sucks when you realize you raised a person you can't respect... maybe its just a phase.
Don't be so hard on yourself, you did the best you could considering the circumstances of your life at any given time?
Does she think her son is going through a phase and will soon behave in a manner where she can respect him? Or that her realization is a phase she is going through.
It reminded me when my children were just about becoming teenagers. It started when one of them was studying, "I'm Okay, You're Okay" in school and I read the entire workbook. Or maybe it was a text book. I had the three of them draw an apple tree with some apples on the ground. The lesson: Apples don't fall far from the tree.
I was trying to exhibit understanding, that as a parent, I was not a great role model and their father was an even worse one. I wanted to get a dialogue going. Fill in the blank: I feel bad when _______. Lets talk about feelings and how we can create a more harmonious environment. Yeah, right. Just another one of those times, kids placate crazy mama. Or something like that.
It would be so easy to comment to the woman: its a two-way street. Meaning, of course, perhaps the child had times when he found it hard to respect his mother. Mom hanging out in bars, drinking, carousing with men or looking for love in all the wrong places. Smoking pot. It is not at all surprising that son took to drinking, and experimenting with drugs. Monkey see, monkey do.
Now I do not know what the woman had to deal with or why she is the person she is; nor was I around 24/7 as the son was growing up. Perhaps she was home with him, helping with his homework, weeknights; taking him to church on Sundays and other things mothers do. Perhaps she was not quite the party girl, she appeared to be to me. I only vaguely recall those days when her son was a child; no specific incidents come to mind, just a general image that the kid was a wild, unruly child.
Could be DNA structure, reaction to parents divorce, raised by a single mother and other things of which I have no knowledge. I am guessing by posting that as a Facebook status update, she is looking for sympathy. I doubt she considered that she is disrespecting her son, by letting the world (of Facebook friends) know he is not worthy of respect. I somehow do not think she was pondering her role as a mother, feeling down that she did not do a better job of it.
Yes, it could be a phase he is going through. Young adults are trying their wings; experiment, make mistakes. Takes time to mature. Some never do. Others will look back at that time period, with dismay and new found appreciation for parents. They might even apologize for bad behavior or strife it caused their parents.
Don't be so hard on yourself, you did the best you could considering the circumstances of your life at any given time?
Does she think her son is going through a phase and will soon behave in a manner where she can respect him? Or that her realization is a phase she is going through.
It reminded me when my children were just about becoming teenagers. It started when one of them was studying, "I'm Okay, You're Okay" in school and I read the entire workbook. Or maybe it was a text book. I had the three of them draw an apple tree with some apples on the ground. The lesson: Apples don't fall far from the tree.
I was trying to exhibit understanding, that as a parent, I was not a great role model and their father was an even worse one. I wanted to get a dialogue going. Fill in the blank: I feel bad when _______. Lets talk about feelings and how we can create a more harmonious environment. Yeah, right. Just another one of those times, kids placate crazy mama. Or something like that.
It would be so easy to comment to the woman: its a two-way street. Meaning, of course, perhaps the child had times when he found it hard to respect his mother. Mom hanging out in bars, drinking, carousing with men or looking for love in all the wrong places. Smoking pot. It is not at all surprising that son took to drinking, and experimenting with drugs. Monkey see, monkey do.
Now I do not know what the woman had to deal with or why she is the person she is; nor was I around 24/7 as the son was growing up. Perhaps she was home with him, helping with his homework, weeknights; taking him to church on Sundays and other things mothers do. Perhaps she was not quite the party girl, she appeared to be to me. I only vaguely recall those days when her son was a child; no specific incidents come to mind, just a general image that the kid was a wild, unruly child.
Could be DNA structure, reaction to parents divorce, raised by a single mother and other things of which I have no knowledge. I am guessing by posting that as a Facebook status update, she is looking for sympathy. I doubt she considered that she is disrespecting her son, by letting the world (of Facebook friends) know he is not worthy of respect. I somehow do not think she was pondering her role as a mother, feeling down that she did not do a better job of it.
Yes, it could be a phase he is going through. Young adults are trying their wings; experiment, make mistakes. Takes time to mature. Some never do. Others will look back at that time period, with dismay and new found appreciation for parents. They might even apologize for bad behavior or strife it caused their parents.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Word Verification
No, I am not a machine. Maybe if I had a computer brain, I could decipher those word verification's required by various websites (including Blogger) when trying to post a comment. I mean, can not the people who create the word verification boxes, make them readable by the human eye. Of course, I get them wrong ~ not because I am a machine but because they are impossible to read with the black backgrounds, squiggly letters and all of that. Jeez.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Bye, bye Airport City
K had not been playing FarmTown on a regular basis. As usual with K and other top level players, when Slashkey updated with new levels, she suddenly started asking me to do work on her farm. She would offer to do my chores while I did hers. Cool. When we hire other farmers we get better ~ well, whatever, I was never up on the exact benefit of hiring ~mo' money or crops or exp or something.
So it was we were on one of my farms when I had a surprise visit from S. S is K's friend. When I first started playing FT, K introduced us, and it was a regular thing for the four of us (K's friend C, also) to work on S's farm. With introduction of better machines to harvest/plow, the helping others died away and I seldom speak to S.
See? A surprise. Later I realized it was not so surprising; K was probably talking to S via Skype or chat and told him where to find her. S invited us to work on his farms and we did. While there I had to go open my big mouth and ask if he was playing Airport City. I had seen a request post on his wall, but gamers often try a game than vamboose. He said that he was, asked the same of me. Told him I quit. "Bored?" he asked.
"No," I told him, "not enough neighbors. S said he would be my neighbor.
D, a man I met way past midnight when I was a FarmTown newbie showed up at Airport City. Things were looking up. SC, a game friend I do not know very well, sent me an Airport City neighbor invite. Great!
Okay, that did not last. Another neighbor who sent me the request "has not visited, so no bonus collection, call her back." Followed by SC, followed by D, followed by S. It is now time to say bye, bye to Airport City.
I can not finish the Duty Free Shop the game demanded I build. Need workers. I sent all neighbors the request. None accepted. I have one dollar game cash which is not enough to hire the rest. No point in playing the game without neighbors to hire, to send gifts, to get fuel when visiting their cities.
I did not remove it just yet. Determined to earn $6,000. for one more expansion. Why? Nutty, I guess.
So it was we were on one of my farms when I had a surprise visit from S. S is K's friend. When I first started playing FT, K introduced us, and it was a regular thing for the four of us (K's friend C, also) to work on S's farm. With introduction of better machines to harvest/plow, the helping others died away and I seldom speak to S.
See? A surprise. Later I realized it was not so surprising; K was probably talking to S via Skype or chat and told him where to find her. S invited us to work on his farms and we did. While there I had to go open my big mouth and ask if he was playing Airport City. I had seen a request post on his wall, but gamers often try a game than vamboose. He said that he was, asked the same of me. Told him I quit. "Bored?" he asked.
"No," I told him, "not enough neighbors. S said he would be my neighbor.
D, a man I met way past midnight when I was a FarmTown newbie showed up at Airport City. Things were looking up. SC, a game friend I do not know very well, sent me an Airport City neighbor invite. Great!
Okay, that did not last. Another neighbor who sent me the request "has not visited, so no bonus collection, call her back." Followed by SC, followed by D, followed by S. It is now time to say bye, bye to Airport City.
I can not finish the Duty Free Shop the game demanded I build. Need workers. I sent all neighbors the request. None accepted. I have one dollar game cash which is not enough to hire the rest. No point in playing the game without neighbors to hire, to send gifts, to get fuel when visiting their cities.
I did not remove it just yet. Determined to earn $6,000. for one more expansion. Why? Nutty, I guess.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Bye to Eco CIty
With only two neighbors who quit the game at Level 1, it is surprising I stayed with Eco City for so long. My reason for trying new Facebook games ~ to write review articles for the former Associated Content ~ is gone ~ that is, since the new Yahoo Voices requires submitting everything for review, and I fear they will reject everything I write, my incentive or motivation became: why bother.
Thus there was no reason for me to be playing Eco City ~ especially since I do not know Portuguese. The reason I am saying bye to Eco City is because there is nothing more I can do there. I am on the 4th expansion, have the money, increased population, as required, to 4000 and game will not let me expand. it seems my boa is too low. Boa is a little green happy face icon which I guess means population happiness. If boa goes to a minus number, the face becomes red and sad.
I can not add more commerce (I think that is how I originally increased boa) because commerce needs to connect to a road. Increasing population took a lot of adding apartment buildings. I found apartment buildings took less space, cost less than single dwellings. Little by little I sold off the bambino casa and other smaller dwellings, replacing with a tall apartment building.
I added all that decor that makes residents happy and gives bonuses when collecting rents. I could sell off a bunch of them, add another roadway and more stuff, but do believe as I remove decor boa will likewise decrease.
This would not have happened if my first 3 expansions had expanded land. But I needed a sewage thingy ~ and that could only be placed in the river, Rio. Since the sewage plant was not reducing river pollution (oh those naughty home owners, sewage heads straight to the river), I had to add a 2nd one. For some unknown reason game would not let me add it near the first one, so my 2nd expansion also expanded river area ~ which did not give enough land space to extend roads.
Too bad I did not try expanding towards the waterfall ~ that may have given me more land as it opened up a bit of the river as well. I decided to expand between my two existing river sections, because it looked silly, with the cutout in middle of rive ~ that added next to no land, so a useless expansion except for aesthetic purposes.
It is a real catch-22 situation, can not add anything without expanding, can not expand without adding stuff. Plus I can not use the lab due to lack of neighbors. So it is bye, bye to Eco City.
Thus there was no reason for me to be playing Eco City ~ especially since I do not know Portuguese. The reason I am saying bye to Eco City is because there is nothing more I can do there. I am on the 4th expansion, have the money, increased population, as required, to 4000 and game will not let me expand. it seems my boa is too low. Boa is a little green happy face icon which I guess means population happiness. If boa goes to a minus number, the face becomes red and sad.
I can not add more commerce (I think that is how I originally increased boa) because commerce needs to connect to a road. Increasing population took a lot of adding apartment buildings. I found apartment buildings took less space, cost less than single dwellings. Little by little I sold off the bambino casa and other smaller dwellings, replacing with a tall apartment building.
I added all that decor that makes residents happy and gives bonuses when collecting rents. I could sell off a bunch of them, add another roadway and more stuff, but do believe as I remove decor boa will likewise decrease.
This would not have happened if my first 3 expansions had expanded land. But I needed a sewage thingy ~ and that could only be placed in the river, Rio. Since the sewage plant was not reducing river pollution (oh those naughty home owners, sewage heads straight to the river), I had to add a 2nd one. For some unknown reason game would not let me add it near the first one, so my 2nd expansion also expanded river area ~ which did not give enough land space to extend roads.
Too bad I did not try expanding towards the waterfall ~ that may have given me more land as it opened up a bit of the river as well. I decided to expand between my two existing river sections, because it looked silly, with the cutout in middle of rive ~ that added next to no land, so a useless expansion except for aesthetic purposes.
It is a real catch-22 situation, can not add anything without expanding, can not expand without adding stuff. Plus I can not use the lab due to lack of neighbors. So it is bye, bye to Eco City.
Paying respects on social media
Author, Ian Lovett of Paying respects on social media, published on February 20, 2012 at The Age dot com Au, says: "Everyone else wanted to be part of this collective mourning as well, even those who had no words of their own to offer." He is speaking about the death of Whitney Houston.
When I posted Whitney Houston videos on my Facebook profile, being part of a "collective mourning", in no way entered my mind. I was as shocked to read about her death as I was to learn of Don Cornelius suicide. In by-gone times, my oldest daughter would have been quick to call me to discuss those deaths. Now-a-days her phone calls are few and far between. Sure, I could have called her, but thought for sure she would comment on my Facebook status update.
Both the singer and Soul Train creator/host were part of our lives via the music. I can not say I was mourning either person's passing; just sad about it.
Ian continues: "This compulsion to weigh in on a news event, even one with only a tangential relationship to one's own life, is endemic among people who use social media, according to Jonathan Taplin..."
Well, here I am falling prey to my compulsion to weigh in on a news article. That is not new with me. Long-time writer of Letters to the Editor or discussing current events with family, friends or co-workers. Facebook is social networking, so why would people not comment on things in the news?
Then he writes: "It was not always thus. For much of the 20th century, this type of public mourning, even for loved ones, was frowned on in Western culture, according to Katherine Ashenburg..." and "toward the end of the last century, as celebrity culture rose, people began mourning for famous people whom they did not know, like John Lennon or Diana, more expressively than they grieved for their own family members."
I think it was mid-century when a nation, if not the world, grieved the assassination of President John F. Kennedy. Less, due to racism, I believe, grieved the murders of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and Malcolm X. Oh, but they were not celebrities, right? Being famous or well-known is the definition of celebrity, a celebrated person.
I asked my sister, "Why are you crying?"
She replied, "Buddy Holly died". I did not understand why that made her cry. Mourning the death of a celebrity? Don McLean wrote a song about it ~ American Pie. He definitely mourned the loss of a rock 'n roll singer. Then there was Elvis, who preceded Lennon in death. I guess they qualify as "toward the end of the century", but Marilyn Monroe was closer to the middle of it. Tribute songs after the death of Marvin Gaye became popular.
It is likely that people were mourning "collectively" long before the end of the century ~ we all just did not know it. Or did we? The radio station that started playing Otis Redding songs non-stop when he died, was listened to by many ~ many who like the DJ's were as saddened by his death as my sister was when Holly, Ritchie Valens and the Big Booper died. The difference now is that our voices are heard faster, instantly, when a beloved celebrity passes.
The reason I read this article, was due to puzzling about what to say to an ambiguous RIP post that landed on my Facebook wall. I have had friends there who lost a parent or other family members to death. They talk about their family health issues as well as their own problems. If we were real-life friends, we would be sharing that info, offering condolence or get-well wishes in person, via telephone or mail. We would even attend the funeral for a friend's parent.
Online or offline, people do discuss news, even news that has only a tangential relationship to their lives. There is no relationship, for example, between my life and the news of a father who committed suicide by blowing up his house, killing his two young sons in the process. I could claim a relationship with the news of an ICE agent being killed after opening fire on his supervisor, due to living in the town where the event happened, but that is not something substantial in relation to my life.
I suspect I am like the majority of people~ we want to discuss current events, even the death of a singer or murders of people we did not know. Truly, I still grieve the loss of a baby due to a drunk driver; I think of her mother, when I cross the street where the tragedy occurred, even though I do not know her. And I have mentioned that death at various places on the Internet.
I do not find think it is news that people do pay their respects on social media, yet do feel compelled to comment on the article.
When I posted Whitney Houston videos on my Facebook profile, being part of a "collective mourning", in no way entered my mind. I was as shocked to read about her death as I was to learn of Don Cornelius suicide. In by-gone times, my oldest daughter would have been quick to call me to discuss those deaths. Now-a-days her phone calls are few and far between. Sure, I could have called her, but thought for sure she would comment on my Facebook status update.
Both the singer and Soul Train creator/host were part of our lives via the music. I can not say I was mourning either person's passing; just sad about it.
Ian continues: "This compulsion to weigh in on a news event, even one with only a tangential relationship to one's own life, is endemic among people who use social media, according to Jonathan Taplin..."
Well, here I am falling prey to my compulsion to weigh in on a news article. That is not new with me. Long-time writer of Letters to the Editor or discussing current events with family, friends or co-workers. Facebook is social networking, so why would people not comment on things in the news?
Then he writes: "It was not always thus. For much of the 20th century, this type of public mourning, even for loved ones, was frowned on in Western culture, according to Katherine Ashenburg..." and "toward the end of the last century, as celebrity culture rose, people began mourning for famous people whom they did not know, like John Lennon or Diana, more expressively than they grieved for their own family members."
I think it was mid-century when a nation, if not the world, grieved the assassination of President John F. Kennedy. Less, due to racism, I believe, grieved the murders of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and Malcolm X. Oh, but they were not celebrities, right? Being famous or well-known is the definition of celebrity, a celebrated person.
I asked my sister, "Why are you crying?"
She replied, "Buddy Holly died". I did not understand why that made her cry. Mourning the death of a celebrity? Don McLean wrote a song about it ~ American Pie. He definitely mourned the loss of a rock 'n roll singer. Then there was Elvis, who preceded Lennon in death. I guess they qualify as "toward the end of the century", but Marilyn Monroe was closer to the middle of it. Tribute songs after the death of Marvin Gaye became popular.
It is likely that people were mourning "collectively" long before the end of the century ~ we all just did not know it. Or did we? The radio station that started playing Otis Redding songs non-stop when he died, was listened to by many ~ many who like the DJ's were as saddened by his death as my sister was when Holly, Ritchie Valens and the Big Booper died. The difference now is that our voices are heard faster, instantly, when a beloved celebrity passes.
The reason I read this article, was due to puzzling about what to say to an ambiguous RIP post that landed on my Facebook wall. I have had friends there who lost a parent or other family members to death. They talk about their family health issues as well as their own problems. If we were real-life friends, we would be sharing that info, offering condolence or get-well wishes in person, via telephone or mail. We would even attend the funeral for a friend's parent.
Online or offline, people do discuss news, even news that has only a tangential relationship to their lives. There is no relationship, for example, between my life and the news of a father who committed suicide by blowing up his house, killing his two young sons in the process. I could claim a relationship with the news of an ICE agent being killed after opening fire on his supervisor, due to living in the town where the event happened, but that is not something substantial in relation to my life.
I suspect I am like the majority of people~ we want to discuss current events, even the death of a singer or murders of people we did not know. Truly, I still grieve the loss of a baby due to a drunk driver; I think of her mother, when I cross the street where the tragedy occurred, even though I do not know her. And I have mentioned that death at various places on the Internet.
I do not find think it is news that people do pay their respects on social media, yet do feel compelled to comment on the article.
Friday, February 17, 2012
WTF
Lyrics to an old song I liked are nowhere near: get full control girl, get full control; yet that was how I sung them for a long time. Before setting off on a search to find something that teaches how to develop self-control, I decided to listen to the song, despite knowing I had the lyrics wrong.
Did not know name of tune, just the artist: Al B Sure. Which reminds me, I saw him in concert...
While I was at You Tube listening to Off On Your Own Girl, I decided I would watch a video I saw last week. I typed in my search: Bobby Brown Oprah interview. You Tube gave me lots of search results for Whitney Houston. Duh, did I mention Ms. Houston? Nooooo
So I tried again: Oprah Bobby Brown interview. You Tube gave me a lot of search results for Whitney Houston. WTF! What part of Bobby Brown/Oprah do You Tube search engines not get? I have not deleted history, so if I go back in time, I may stumble upon a video that has the Oprah interview listed on sidebar selection of related videos. Oy, that will be time consuming.
Like most people I watched a lot of Whitney Houston videos following her death. It would be so much easier if the search engine gave me relevant results. Oh, there was one search result that mentioned Bobby Brown: Bobby Brown is S*#@ (or whatever symbols the poster used to convey his or her feelings about the Brown).
Did not know name of tune, just the artist: Al B Sure. Which reminds me, I saw him in concert...
While I was at You Tube listening to Off On Your Own Girl, I decided I would watch a video I saw last week. I typed in my search: Bobby Brown Oprah interview. You Tube gave me lots of search results for Whitney Houston. Duh, did I mention Ms. Houston? Nooooo
So I tried again: Oprah Bobby Brown interview. You Tube gave me a lot of search results for Whitney Houston. WTF! What part of Bobby Brown/Oprah do You Tube search engines not get? I have not deleted history, so if I go back in time, I may stumble upon a video that has the Oprah interview listed on sidebar selection of related videos. Oy, that will be time consuming.
Like most people I watched a lot of Whitney Houston videos following her death. It would be so much easier if the search engine gave me relevant results. Oh, there was one search result that mentioned Bobby Brown: Bobby Brown is S*#@ (or whatever symbols the poster used to convey his or her feelings about the Brown).
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Sad Facebook Status Update
A status update on my wall was a photo of a young lady and baby: In Memory of Jane Doe*. I clicked on the words, taking me to a full size photo and the words: In Memory of a sweet girl and Mother to our beautiful granddaughter...You life was ripped away from you before you had even begun to live it.
In Memory of a sweet girl and Mother to our beautiful granddaughter...You life was ripped away from you before you had even begun to live it
That is a sad Facebook status update, but not very informative. The person who posted it is a new friend; we play a mutual game and she was looking for neighbors. Since so many of mine quit playing, I added her as a friend/neighbor. I spent some time on her wall, trying to determine how her daughter died (or daughter-in-law). The new Facebook Timeline posts are so huge, it is hard to scroll to find relevant posts.
I do not know what to say to the woman. Is Condolences enough? Was the death recent? After a long illness or sudden, such as car accident? Someone left a comment: I am sorry for your loss. (spelled: lost) I could parrot the same thing, which is redundant. My heart bleeds for her pain ~ do know how I would feel if one of my daughters passed away, especially the one with daughters of her own. Telling a stranger that sounds too gooey.
It is not the first time I have seen stuff like this. I vaguely remember asking a game friend if she minded sharing details of her sister's death. It was uncomfortable doing so.
If people are comfortable sharing personal info with people who are not personal friends or family, I wish they would be more explicit.
*Name changed to Jane Doe for privacy.
In Memory of a sweet girl and Mother to our beautiful granddaughter...You life was ripped away from you before you had even begun to live it
That is a sad Facebook status update, but not very informative. The person who posted it is a new friend; we play a mutual game and she was looking for neighbors. Since so many of mine quit playing, I added her as a friend/neighbor. I spent some time on her wall, trying to determine how her daughter died (or daughter-in-law). The new Facebook Timeline posts are so huge, it is hard to scroll to find relevant posts.
I do not know what to say to the woman. Is Condolences enough? Was the death recent? After a long illness or sudden, such as car accident? Someone left a comment: I am sorry for your loss. (spelled: lost) I could parrot the same thing, which is redundant. My heart bleeds for her pain ~ do know how I would feel if one of my daughters passed away, especially the one with daughters of her own. Telling a stranger that sounds too gooey.
It is not the first time I have seen stuff like this. I vaguely remember asking a game friend if she minded sharing details of her sister's death. It was uncomfortable doing so.
If people are comfortable sharing personal info with people who are not personal friends or family, I wish they would be more explicit.
*Name changed to Jane Doe for privacy.
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